Assorted, Honestly

Bryntin on Brexit

Bryntin has not attempted to write about Brexit an awful lot recently, just the occasional forlorn aside every now and then when the pace of things happening relents a little.

However, it of course dominates the news here in Britain.

Photo by Marianna on

At first, he tried hard not to show any leaning to one side or the other, mainly just in case one of his three readers was particularly and strongly against his viewpoint and left in a huff. Bryntin doesn’t like huffing, particularly because, if one huffed off, he would then only have two readers left – and one of them was his Mum. Incidentally, he gave up puffing a long time ago as well.

Eventually though, views one way or the other became plainer to see for everyone and Bryntin’s may have appeared less ambiguously too. Many people in Britain became experts in what the EU is, does now and wants for the future. Even if they had no interest in the topic before and were happy to finally dispense with the ration books and aspire to and to enjoy a little home-owning, economically successful middle-classed lot in life for the last 40 odd years since last being asked anything about it at all.

In fact, now fully Facebook ad whipped and Daily Mailed up, they would now likely be on top of the subject opinion wise, and happily comment on the need or not for frictionless borders, the laws surrounding the international trade of goods and complicated customs, alternative trade models, tariff and VAT arrangements and, most likely, how much we did or did not need immigrants, particularly the funny-tinged ones.

Some of these opinions were based on actual credible looking sources but most seem to have been just repeated from other reliable sources, like Marjorie down at the bowling club and Frank at the pub or that knowledgable seeming news account with over 3,000,000 followers on Facebook or worse, the Daily Mail. Not, of course, the plainly biased lovey-left wing/state-sponsored right wing BBC or any other ‘mainstream media’.

Today’s latest, as of about three minutes ago, is that Prime Minister Johnson (Bryntin refuses to do the ‘Boris’ thing here as it encourages a jokey, clowny, friendly first-name terms image that has been carefully propogated over the years that he frankly does not deserve) is trumpeting that he has managed to negotiate a deal with the EU which he has extremely triumphantly and skilfully done by getting them to agree to pretty much do what they wanted to do before Theresa May tried to mess about with it. Parliament should now just vote it through without too much fuss and we can all get on with the rest of our lives, he says. The people just want it done.


Now of course, the trick with dealing with anything PM Johnson comes out with is first, to dispense with all the ‘ahh… umm… thing is.. as I already said… the thing is… well, I have never, ummm… yes, well what the British people want to hear is…’ and then treat the five words left as very probably a lie in the event they make much sense. But Bryntin does rather think that Johnson does indeed want it done, mainly because he didn’t really want to be the one doing it and would very much like to not be doing it any more.

Basically,he wanted all the good bits of being the country’s PM; the pomp and the respect and the lovely lunches and the post PM’ship deal for his biography, without all the sticky and tricky decisions and actually running the country stuff.

In this case, the EU have put all of the deal online and it’s available for all to see on this link, should you be in desparate need of getting to grips with it all. Although the UK Government aren’t intending for our Parliament to have access to it until tomorrow.

Although Bryntin suspects it will be as read in-depth by anyone not a journalist or politician with as much concentration on the detail and meat of it as you do when you just press ‘Agree’ on the EULA for the latest hot game you just downloaded and installed from the Google or Apple stores.

Rather disappointingly, this seems to be pretty much the process a lot of MP’s take to the whole thing. Bryntin suspects a lot of them will just sit in their office and play the latest hot game they downloaded and installed and pressed ‘Agree’ to the EULA on their phones and wait for a message from the party whip to tell them which lobby, yea or nay, they’ll have to go through at 7pm or so on Saturday, knowing that if they do as they’re told now, they might be looked at favourably for a larger office in the next round of backslapping.

Now, of course, all of the past three years of pushing and shoving and pointing and covering up is a complete irrelevance to what is now up for voting on. And the hope, for people who like Bryntin, didn’t feel particularly oppressed by the regulatory jackboots (note to self – research what a jackboot is) of the EU on his throat – and just enjoyed the thought he might quite like to buy a property in France somewhere at sometime in the future to while away his pensionable years, eating cheese and baguettes and occasionally taking a bike ride up a mountain range, nipping in to see his daughter studying in Italy perhaps, or up to Holland to see his son in a freedom of movement sort of way – is that this ‘deal’ will only need to be presented and beaten the once in Parliament, unlike the previous May effort being attempted three times.

Bryntin takes a simple position on the whole thing.

In the referendum, Bryntin voted to Remain because he couldn’t see how Leaving was to be of any benefit to the country at all. Leaving was all about taking things away and then promising that they would be put back but better. But Bryntin looked at the people doing the promising and decided, hmmm… lying bastards before this, probably lying bastards now.

So he trooped off to the polling station, then sat, mouth agape and wet-eyed when looking at the news about the results the next morning. But then thought to himself ‘This probably won’t happen in the end, so I’ll try not to let it get to me too much. Bugger though… the gullible idiots…’

And nothing that has happened since has really changed his opinion. If someone sat down and explained to him properly, with a cup of tea and a copious supply of Custard Creams, how it is demonstrably and with evidence going to be better to leave behind the best deal any country has got in the EU and how the Government had to twist and turn and try every legal trick they could think of, and throw billions at anyone in posession of a Parliamentary vote, chuck out long-standing Members who wouldn’t vote for their way, and suspend Parliament and lie to the Queen and spend millions on promoting a website link in adverts all over the place and hope to get us through all this by sheer weight of propoganda but with no demonstrably beneficial point to it all that they can spell out, then he would be willing to sit and listen.

He would, honest. (Please look up the word’honest’ before you come though. And perhaps ‘evidence’). But if you use parroted catchphrases and slogans or the word ‘believe’ in it anywhere, you can fuck off.

So, here’s to whatever works in getting us to a stage where revoking Article 50 – the leaving process triggered by Theresa May when she was trying to look like Margaret Thatcher 2.0, but ended up being Backbencher 0.2 Beta (non-speaking edition), all convinced and strong seeming but without much thought to how she’d actually manage it – can be made to happen.

Please do come back to visit O4FS again, provided you have the necessary documentary evidence of having been resident at least once before of course, and for a continuous period not shorter than five seconds.
Bryntin hopes to be continuing to provide an entertaining service that will definitely be as good as before, or maybe worse at first but probably better in the long run, although other factors might change that, especially since nobody defined what sort of better you might have been expecting get exactly anyway but he promises it’ll be good.

Note: If you like what I wrote up there, why not share it among other people who you know and you think might like it too but would not otherwise be seen dead hanging around in a ditch like this.

Or of course, if you don’t want them to know you’ve been hanging around in a ditch like this, don’t.

4 thoughts on “Bryntin on Brexit”

  1. Well said. It’s some haul trying to keep up with all the shifts and turns. This I have done in earnest since 2016 when the whole sorry mess began. It’s like being nailed to the sofa with your eyes wired open to face the TV and forced to watch non-stop streaming of Eastenders (apologies to E fans… actually no, it’s the pits of a show imho).

    Liked by 1 person

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